it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
