Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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