I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
We need a shit load of segways right now
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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