I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
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