It's Friday. Sex?
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Randomize
