You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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