WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize
