yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Randomize
