Taylor Swift is so right about you.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
