she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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