Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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