he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
We have so much sex to catch up on
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
Randomize
