We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
