Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Randomize
