I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
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