Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(920): View more from Wisconsin

I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.

Fav 15 3969 941
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(941): View more from Florida

still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break

Fav 9 4712 922
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(913): View more from Kansas

You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy

Fav 12 5655 1475
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(970): View more from Colorado

Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.

Fav 4 955 1250
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(337): View more from Louisiana

Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?

Fav 9 1147 1513
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(209): View more from California

His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.

Fav 9 1671 887
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(414): View more from Wisconsin

They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.

Fav 3 598 960
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(727): View more from Florida

I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.

Fav 5 341 107
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(843): View more from South Carolina

To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.

Fav 0 59 5
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