nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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