i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
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