Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
