The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
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