Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize
