Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
I'm too high and old for this...
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Randomize
