Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
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