He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
