i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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