Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
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