I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
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Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
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I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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