i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
