You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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