When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
