Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
