Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Randomize
