Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!