Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (803): You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo http://tfl.nu/7wt5
  Replies (35) Good night (4219) Bad night (712)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (732): FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket. http://tfl.nu/p1i6
  Replies (29) Good night (6614) Bad night (865)
• Favorite

  (530): View more from California

  I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (530): I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame. http://tfl.nu/96nu
  Replies (45) Good night (767) Bad night (2599)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (512): New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville. http://tfl.nu/rzyg
  Replies (46) Good night (1319) Bad night (4115)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (805): I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!" http://tfl.nu/ih8w
  Replies (24) Good night (4232) Bad night (793)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  it was like fucking gandolphs beard

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (405): it was like fucking gandolphs beard http://tfl.nu/vnqc
  Replies (30) Good night (1084) Bad night (6934)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?

  (217): View more from Illinois

  I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (314): Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos? (217): I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd. http://tfl.nu/vu96
  Replies (14) Good night (3847) Bad night (1746)
• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.

  (1-925): View more from California

  If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (925): Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often. (1-925): If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough. http://tfl.nu/t59l
  Replies (1) Good night (1666) Bad night (848)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (480): Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT. http://tfl.nu/l2cm
  Replies (8) Good night (2077) Bad night (680)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday http://tfl.nu/2qux
  Replies (1) Good night (1362) Bad night (581)
• Favorite

  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (780): let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING http://tfl.nu/vf6d
  Replies (7) Good night (2140) Bad night (722)
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Toronto

  feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (416): feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano? http://tfl.nu/gww1
  Replies (7) Good night (1692) Bad night (414)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about? http://tfl.nu/f79i
  Replies (4) Good night (495) Bad night (563)
• Favorite

  (343): View more from Ontario

  Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?

  (1-343): View more from Ontario

  Lol, last year was UNREAL

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (343): Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy? (1-343): Lol, last year was UNREAL http://tfl.nu/u4kx
  Replies (10) Good night (1404) Bad night (405)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me http://tfl.nu/imcf
  Replies (1) Good night (537) Bad night (357)

Randomize