is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Randomize