I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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