windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
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The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
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I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
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