Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
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All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
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I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
not ubering you a puppy
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
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