super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
