just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize
