I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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