He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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