I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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