Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
I wanna passion pit in your ass
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
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