Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
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