What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
