I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
