You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
