May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
i just had sex bonerless
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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