Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Semen is not good for contacts.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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