hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I just blew my weed a kiss
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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